Dorothy: Ma, Stan gave me an engagement ring. 
Sophia: I see. Excuse me. 
 *Sticks head in microwave.*
Dorothy: Ma, that's a microwave!
Sophia: I know, I want to get this over as quickly as possible.

lucynic83:

Lucy, how do you think up all these wonderful things?

Happy 90th Birthday Bea Arthur!

May 13, 1922 - April 25, 2009

mrhankey:

lucy don’t give a shit

Blanche: Okay girls, how do I look? 
Rose: Oh, Blanche, you look beautiful!
Blanche: But do I look like a mother? 
Sophia: Are you kidding? From the side you look like you're about to drop twins.